


Breathe in, Wheeze Out

by the_scarlet_01



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Asthma, Established Relationship, M/M, Prompt Fill, Scared Eddie, Suffer in silence Buck, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-17 00:23:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21507583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_scarlet_01/pseuds/the_scarlet_01
Summary: The recent events in Buck's life have brought back a problem from his childhood, asthma. After a call that involved dust and a giant freezer Buck is struggling. He manages to hide it from the team, but he can't hide it from Eddie when an attack hits while he's asleep at Eddie's.Based on prompt: Hi! can you write something where Buck had childhood asthma and it comes back after a bad call while he's spending the night at Eddies? Thank you!
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 7
Kudos: 451





	Breathe in, Wheeze Out

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd.  
> This is one topic I have experience with. I was diagnosed with sports induced asthma as a child. I struggled with it a lot in elementary school, high school track and field and marching band was tough. Walking a cold college campus in MI caused them during undergrad. It was not easy. I rarely have them now, but it did help add some realism to this fic. Enjoy!

There are times in Buck’s life that he couldn’t breathe. They started when he was a child, most of the memories of those times are either fuzzy and hard to remember, or burned into his brain by fear and the pain he had felt. The doctors had told his parents that most of those incidents were caused by asthma. Asthma attacks always had Buck wheezing and coughing, while clawing at his chest, with tears in his eyes. It was like no matter how hard he tried to breathe, I just didn’t work. He’d had inhalers and nebulizers that made it all manageable as a kid. As he’d gotten older he started having fewer attacks, whether it was because the sports he played had helped his lungs get stronger, or if he grew out of it, he didn’t know. He still got attacks during the bitter cold days of winter in Pennsylvania, but he had it under control. It got even easier when he moved to LA. No freezing cold snow days that gripped his lungs like a vice and robbed him of ability to breathe. Sure, he kept an inhaler at his apartment. It was probably expired by at that point. He never needed it. On the job his mask kept the smoke out of his lungs. He was active. He was healthy. He’d managed to keep it under control after the truck smashed his leg. The pulmonary embolism hadn’t helped, but no one seemed worried. He hadn’t really had a problem until after the tsunami. The salt water had wreaked havoc on his lungs. His throat and lungs had burned from it long after the water receded. His airways had been irritated and so attacks happened from things he’d hadn’t had problems with in years. The worst was dust. So for a few weeks after he’d made sure to keep his apartment spotless, only sleeping a few hours at a time and not being at work gave him plenty of time to clean. The doctors had given him a new inhaler and had him get a new nebulizer for home. No one but the doctors knew about the problems he’d been having, and that was the way he wanted to keep it, especially after he dropped the lawsuit and returned to work. By the time Bobby had let him back on calls he hadn’t had an attack in weeks.

Buck was nearing the end of a long shift when the alarms went off. He jumped up and made his way to the truck. Once they were on the road Bobby filled them in on what they were facing. It was a partial collapse inside a factory shipping facility. They had at least three men trapped in a large freezer. They put on their warmest gear and headed in. The call was going well, they’d managed to free the workers, but while they were clearing the scene the youngest firefighter was having trouble breathing. Buck didn’t know if it was the dust from damage or the cold of the freezer, but he could feel the invisible weight on his chest. He could feel the wheezing start, but he did his best to hide it. He just needed to get to his inhaler in his car. His shift was technically over, so as soon as he got to the station he hurried to the locker room to change and out to his car when he was finished.

Eddie had been watching his partner closely since they got back on the truck after the call. Buck had been quiet and seemed anxious. He’d tried to get Buck to talk him, but all his boyfriend would do is smile and nod. It was obvious to Eddie that Buck’s smile was tight and forced. He was starting to really worry when Buck bolted to the locker room. Their shift was over but usually Buck will at least help with the post call work. After the work was finished and everyone was heading home, Eddie headed out to the parking lot. Buck’s car was gone. Eddie and Buck were going to take Christopher out to dinner later, so he tried not to worry too much. Eddie headed home, and helped Christopher get ready. A half hour later, Buck entered the house. Eddie studied him closely. His boyfriend looked tired.

“You okay, Buck?” Eddie asked him.

“Yeah, just had a long day.” Buck smiled.

“You want to change plans?” Eddie asked. “We can go out some other night. I’m sure Chris wont mind as long as you’re here.”

“No, I’m okay. Let’s go.” Buck nodded.

The three of them had a quiet dinner at one of Christopher’s favorite restaurants. It was a pizzeria that was not too far from their house. Usually they’d just have it delivered but every few weeks they’d make a night out of it. They’d go to the pizzeria, then the ice cream parlor. By the time they’d head back Christopher would be asleep in car. Moving the sleeping boy was a well rehearsed routine by now. Eddie would carefully extract his son from the car, Buck grabbing Chris’ crutches and getting all the doors until they made it to the sleeping boy’s room. Eddie would set the boy on his bed as Buck set the crutches where Christopher could reach them. Eddie’d take the boy’s glasses and shoes off, while Buck grabbed his pajamas. They worked silently and just as in sync as they did on calls. After Christopher was tucked in, they went to relax in the living room. Eddie handed Buck a beer and decided to watch the end of a basketball game. Eddie smiled fondly at Buck when the younger man fell asleep on the couch. He knew Buck must have been exhausted if he fell asleep on the couch. So Eddie just covered his boyfriend with a blanket, lowered the volume on the TV and watched the end of the game. The next thing he knew Buck sat bolt upright, his chest heaving and a violent cough causing him to shake. Eddie was on his feet before he could even register why. He was on his knees in front of his struggling boyfriend in an instant. After an initial moment of panic Buck realized it was a familiar feeling. It felt like a stack of bricks was on his chest. Every gasping breath in wheezed on the way out. He was having an asthma attack.

“Buck! Hey what’s going on?” Eddie’s heart was in his throat. It reminded him so much of Buck’s pulmonary embolism. He almost expected to see blood coming out of his boyfriend’s mouth.

Buck shook his head, the short gasping and wheezing breathes stole his voice as it always had. He had no way to tell Eddie what was wrong. He needed his jacket. He’d kept his inhaler with him after he’d used in the car. He knew that after having one he needed to be more cautious. He’d have to talk to his doctor about getting another inhaler for work, but right now, he needed the one he had in his jacket pocket. He tried to stand up to go get it, pushing off Eddie’s shoulder as he did, but the former medic stood up and grabbed him, trying to get him to lay down. Buck violently shook his head. Even though Buck was taller than Eddie, Eddie had muscle on his side. He also had the advantage that Buck was only getting a small amount of oxygen through his lungs. Eddie used that advantage to get Buck back on the couch. Eddie went to grab his phone and call for help when Buck grabbed his arm. Eddie’s eyes snapped to Buck’s bloodshot eyes. Buck shook his head and pointed to where his jacket was thrown over a nearby chair. Then he mimed using his inhaler. Buck repeated the gestures a few more times before it seemed to click in Eddie’s head. Eddie ran to grab Buck’s jacket and searched it franticly. He pulled the inhaler out of the pocket and rushed back to his boyfriend. He helped Buck use the inhaler. His own breath held tight in his chest as he prayed it worked. Eddie’s heart was pounding. How did he not know Buck had asthma? After a while Buck’s wheezing slowed and eventually stopped. The younger man falling back against the couch cushions as his airways opened back up. The man was utterly exhausted, his hands still shaking.

“Jesus, Evan! Why the hell didn’t you tell me you had asthma?” Eddie dropped down in the seat next to him. He head falling back against the cushions as well.

“Sorry,” Buck mumbled as he glanced over his shoulder to make sure Christopher hadn’t been disturbed by the chaotic event. When the boy’s door stayed closed, Buck let his head fall back to the cushion. He looked over at his partner as his breathing was slowly returning back to its regular pattern.

“You scared the hell out of me, Ev.” Eddie moved closer. As much as he wants to pull his boyfriend into a hug and hold him tight, Eddie didn’t want to do anything that would make it harder for Buck’s still recovering lungs. So he settled for carding his fingers through his short blonde locks.

“Sorry,” Buck repeated. When his breathing had evened out and he could finally speak more than one word at a time he decided Eddie needed an explanation. “I had it as a kid, sometimes at recess, or if I played too hard in gym class, or when it was really cold outside. It got better as I got older. Hadn’t had one since I moved to LA, away from the cold winter, until recently. I had the first one in what felt like ages after the tsunami. The salt water had irritated my lungs. For a few weeks a bit of dust or anything like that made my airways to pretty much slam shut. It got better and I figured I was fine, but just in case I started keeping my inhaler closer.”

“Wait, you said the cold does it? Is that why you were acting weird after that factory call earlier?” Eddie asked. Buck nodded. “Why didn’t you tell one of us?”

“I don’t know, I hadn’t told anyone about it and I didn’t want anyone to worry. My inhaler was in my car, so when we got back I knew I had to get to my car.” Buck chuckled. “Pretty sure I put my shirt on backwards when I changed I was in such a hurry.”

“What if you’d have passed out before you could get it?” Eddie’s mind was spiraling with scenarios that all ended horribly. “We’d have had no idea what was happening or how to help. What if your inhaler hadn’t been enough and one of us had to find you passed out in your car, barely breathing. What if-,”

“Eddie,” Buck sat up straighter so he could try to drag Eddie’s attention back to the here and now, and out of the ‘what ifs’. He took his boyfriend’s hand in his and squeezed. “I know, okay? I know. It was dumb, okay? I should have told you, probably Bobby too after the tsunami, but then everything happened with the lawsuit, and then you weren’t talking to me. And I’d worked so hard to get back, I didn’t want to give Bobby another reason to try and sideline me, even though by then it wasn’t even really an issue. I thought if I showed any weakness then it’d just prove him right, that I wasn’t ready. Then it’d all have been for nothing, again.” Buck tried to pull himself together. It would have been just his luck to come out of an asthma attack and end up in a panic attack. “I just wanted to be back with you guys in the field. I didn’t want to lose you guys again.” Buck squeezed his eyes shut and willed the tears away.

“Hey, no, Evan…” Eddie pulled Buck to him and hugged him. “You aren’t weak. You’re body went through an insane amount of trauma in a single year. Your lungs took a beating between the embolism and nearly drowning, you’re lucky you didn’t end up with bronchitis or pneumonia.” Eddie kissed his boyfriend’s forehead. He felt horrible. All of this could have been prevented if they hadn’t treated him so bad during the lawsuit. If Eddie hadn’t given him the cold shoulder and if Bobby hadn’t tried to keep him sidelined, then Buck wouldn’t have had two terrible asthma attacks in a single day. “If this is the only long term consequence from all that shit, then we are so damn lucky. We can manage this issue, okay? This means we make sure you have inhalers here and at work, maybe one in your gear bag.” Eddie rubbed the younger man’s back trying to sooth some of the muscles that he knew had to ache from struggling to breathe. “And we’ll get nebulizers and all that stuff. We’ll make sure you have it at work and here. Hen and Chim’ll probably have some ideas too. Did your doctors know about this when they cleared you for work?”

“Yeah, they figured by the time I’d get back to work it’d be back to a manageable state, and it was. I just left my inhaler in the car instead of in my locker or with my gear. I was actually going to see about getting another one anyway.” Buck nodded. “I’ll talk to Cap tomorrow. Right now I just want to go to sleep.”

“Okay,” Eddie stood up and used their joined hands to pull Buck to his feet. “But this is coming with us.” He picked up the inhaler from where Buck had left it on the couch. “I’ll put it on the nightstand.”

“You’re just too good to me.” Buck pulled his boyfriend in for a kiss.

Eddie gently kissed him back. “Well someone has to take care of you, we all know you don’t.”

“Gotta keep you busy somehow.” Buck smirked.

“Oh I can think of better ways to spend our time.” Eddie winked as they walked into the bedroom.

“I like the sound of that.”Buck laughed, stripping off his shirt.

“But not tonight,” Eddie stated as he nudged Buck to sit on the bed, earning a pout from the younger man. “Not going for another asthma attack, it’s not a hat trick or a strike out. You’ve already had two too many today.” Eddie kissed him sweetly.

“Love you,” Buck smiled up at Eddie.

“Love you, too.” Eddie smiled back. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.  
> As usual I own nothing.  
> Read my works or send me prompts on tumblr at sortofanobsession


End file.
